Is it me? Is it just my kids? Am I just insane? Or does it seem like each and every day is the first time your kids have ever lived a day before…at least when it comes to things like getting ready for school or cleaning things up.
I mean, it’s the same story every morning. Does this sound about right?
Kids wake up and try to sneak into the living room to watch TV. I get up and start getting breakfast and their lunch ready. Once it’s ready, I tell them to sit down. They ignore me, in a trance. I say “turn it off, time for breakfast.” After 3 times, I get angry and then they look at me, dazed and puzzled, as if to say “what do I do with said breakfast, and why do I need to do it right now?” I then have to remind them that we have to get ready and go to school. Again. As usual. There’s a meek and faded sense of acknowledgment at that point. We then have to actually have them accept the food that is given to them (“daddy, I wanted X”/”daddy, I don’t like Y”). Then we have to have them eat, without spilling it all over and without annoying the crap our of each other in the process. Once that is done, it’s vitamin time…a good time since it’s all like candy (gummy, goodness I must say). Then, it’s time to wash up. Inevitably at this point, there’s whining and the questions of “why do I have to wash up?” and “do I have to wash up right now?” Again, I remind…school. After that (yes, you do have to wash your hands, your face, and brush your teeth) is completed, we have to dress them. This is a process, usually with my daughter who has to wear frilly, swirly dresses even when it’s snowing outside. Throughout the process I keep reminding them that we have to hurry or we’ll be late. Late? Late for what? We have to be somewhere, and at a certain time? Really?
It’s remarkable, it’s constant, and it’s something I cherish being able to do each morning. I know it will end soon, so despite the madness and fits of rage, I do try to enjoy every minute of it…right down to the piggy back walks to school and the kisses good bye. These are good times. Fleeting and good.
It truly amazes me how loud my kids are. They are so little yet so loud. I mean, really, truly loud. I mean, really truly most of the time. It never ends. Unless they are engulfed in a TV or Nintendo DS induced coma, they are loud.
I have tried to measure this phenomenon. The ratio of loud to body mass index is off the charts. It’s like solving for the true value of Pi (not that round of stuff). It could very well be man’s greatest mystery.
I’m sure it’s perfectly normal, I’m sure every kid is like that. I’m sure I was like that, as well as you. But, really, how? How is it possible?
From the minute they wake up to the last gasp before bed. I ask them to keep quiet because mommy is sleeping. That lasts for 28 seconds. I ask them when I’m on the phone. That lasts 31 seconds. They truly forget. I don’t think it’s a malicious attempt at getting attention or at irking me. They are just loud, by nature. Like a pack of wild dogs.
Sometimes, like in the bathroom, I feel my eardrums being demented. I have to cover my ears. It’s like a sonic boom, warping my brain. It could be a weapon vs. terror. Have one kid in a bathroom on every plane, then pipe the sound in if something is going down. Problem solved.
The only time they are not really loud and not entranced is when they are trying to hide from me or do something they should not be doing. With the hiding, they forget, too, though…and start making noise so I find them after 33 seconds. Doing something naughty…that’s pretty solid silence.
Am I crazy here? Does anyone know how this is possible? I, and my sanity, would just love to find out.
A chuckle a day keeps the crazies away…
This mom is stepping up big time and I love it. Good for her, which should hopefully be good for her son. This is pretty impressive. I don’t think I would have thought like this, but even people that do no so great things have to be embarrassed by it at least a little bit. She’s even called 9-1-1 when she found out her son was selling drugs. That takes guts, but it’s the right thing to do. Period.
The key for me is to not take crap from your kids when you know they’re wrong. You’re the parent and 99 times out of 100 you know better. Enough with this PC “I don’t want to hurt their feelings” garbage. Sometimes you must. And sometimes you have to make them feel bad. Sometimes you have too embarrass them. Sometimes, to save your kids, you have to lose a little face. But in the process, you are going to gain a lot more. If more people worried about doing the right thing rather than the things that’s easiest of the thing that they think people want them to do, we’d have a lot less problems today. You do what you must to raise your kids the right way.
Well done. And goo for Dr. Drew for putting them on.
Here’s the exchange on Dr. Drew’s Life Changers and the video:
Dr. Drew – “Alont’a how did that sign make you feel?”
Alont’a (son) – “Nervous…shocked and embarrassed.”
Dr. Drew – “Are you surprised your mom went to these lengths?”
Alont’a – “Yeah.”
Dr. Drew – “You thought she wouldn’t take action and she wouldn’t do anything?”
Alont’a – “Yeah.”
Dr. Drew – “Do you understand why she’s so desperate?”
Alont’a – “…Yeah but some ways I don’t.”
Dr. Drew – “I heard you actually stole your neighbors lawnmower?”
Alont’a – “Yeah.”
Dynesha (mom) – “Lawnmower, leaf blower, hedge trimmer and sold half of the merchandise before he got home.”
Dr. Drew – “What were you doing with the money?…buying drugs and selling drugs for more money?”
Alont’a – “Yeah.”
Dr. Drew – “So he’s selling drugs?”
Dynesha – “He tried. But I bust that butt as soon as I seen something. I called 911…”
Dr. Drew – “You know few parents will actually do that…”
Dynesha – “I’m not going to be like my grandmother…I’m gonna stop mine.”
Dr. Drew – “She protected the kids? How did that work out?”
Dynesha – “Her kids spent the rest of their life in and out of the system…my boys won’t be like that.”
A chuckle a day keeps the crazies away…
A chuckle a day keeps the crazies away…
Get the Details on Facebook and Twitter
Bill is a guy trying to be dad and husband while running an online media company at home with his wife. Piece of cake.
RSS
eMail
Meander About